Showing posts with label Newcastle. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Newcastle. Show all posts

Premier League Transfer News

It's the start of August, and clubs have less than a month to haul their cheque book out of their designer suit pockets and splash the cash on the players that they believe will improve their squad and help them to win back some of the millions they spent and win some trophies along the way. It is also a time for newspapers to spew out ridiculous rumours which get every fans hopes up, only for us to be let down. So lets spoil ourselves and have an engaging but cautious look at the rumours that are circulating today.

Guiseppe Rossi is involved in an interesting rumour today. Apparently, Rossi could be on his way out of Villarreal, with a few clubs interested. However, those few clubs could be irrelevant because the player has a clause in his contract which allows Manchester United, his former club to have first choice as to whether they want to sign him or not. The price that United will be quoted however is £12 million. If United offer this, it would be even more perplexing than the players first name, as Ozil is also going for £12 million, and I would rather Ozil than Rossi.

Next, and former Arsenal midfielder, Mathieu Flamini, a man with an equally confusing first name, is interesting Premier League new boys Newcastle and the team still asking for a ridiculous £30 million for James Milner, Aston Villa. The Frenchman is currently playing for AC Milan, but after only starting 14 times last season, and often in defence, he feels unwanted, unloved, and wants to play more, so he sees a return to England as the perfect place to restore his career.

Arsenal are still trying to find some more defenders so they can play a 7-2-1 formation to protect Manuel Almunias goal. Oh, whats that? A new goalkeeper? Yes, Arsenal are interested in bringing German pair, Derdar Tasci (centre back) and Rene Adler (goalkeeper) to London to beef up their defence which is in dire need of beefing up as William Gallas and Sol Campbell have left - taking a lot of the beef with them. Many believe that Arsenals problem is that their defence is so poor, their goalkeepers make way to many mistakes, and those reasons are why Arsenal have had a poor trophy drought. So a new goalkeeper who isn't prone to mistakes and a solid defender added to the mix will do Arsenals title challenge the world of good.

Aiden McGeady seems sure to leave Celtic this summer, and Aston Villa could be his destination. The flying winger could be the perfect replacement for James "£30Million" Milner as Manchester City continue to struggle to prise Martin O'Neills firm grasping hand off of the amazingly overrated Milner. There is no doubt that if City finally do cough up the money for Milner, then Villa will have money to spend, and £10-12 million may be enough to see McGeady say goodbye to Scotland.

As Manchester City try and sell a few player, Olympiacos, Marseille and Fenerbache are the three clubs trying to buy Roque Santa Cruz, with no other reason than... he used to be quite good. Might as well throw in a completley stupid Manchester City rumor as well, but this time City aren't buying. I have no idea where this came from, but apparently Tevez is "depressed" in Manchester and Jose Mourinho wants to comfort him by offering him the chance to re-join Ronaldo at Real Madrid. Thats sure to cheer him up.

Finally some Actual Transfer News


One of these days I won't have to mention Manchester City in a transfer window update. Yes, it might be a while, but it will happen... I hope.
Yes, Manchester City have apparently moved a step closer to signing Mario Balotelli. It's been a hell of a big staircase, but now the Inter President has told everyone that if Balotelli were to leave then he is by no means "indespensable". The tabloids say that this is a "hint" that a deal could be closer to being finalised. I just wish that they hurry up and finish it. The Inter players don't like him, Manchester City do, Mario likes City back, and City have loads of money. Whats the problem?

Next, and Sol Campbell has moved to Newcastle United. A strong, gigantic, experienced defender to lead out the newly promoted Magpies in their quest to stay in the Premier League, it seems like a good deal for Chris Hughton. With Dan Gosling also joining on a free, and Hatem Ben-Arfa of Marseille also rumoured to be on Newcastles wanted list, it seems like Newcastle could be building up to the team they used to be, and a forced to be reckoned with. Not yet of course, there is still a long way to go, but slowly and steadily they are getting there.
Roy Hodgson has been keeping himself busy too. Luke Young, the Aston Villa defender who can play left or right, he's probably not bothered as long as he plays, has signed for the Mersyside club. Meanwhile, Maxi Rodriguez will be seen as another pointless and useless signing by Rafael Benitez as he heads to Espanyol after joining for £1.5 million last year.

Tottenham have reportedly had a bid for Scott Parker rejected by West Ham, as the Hammers try their hardest to keep hold of the man that almost single handedly kept West Ham in the Premier League last season. Talking of rejection, Real Madrid legend, Raul rejected a chance to move to England with his preference to be German club Shalke.

Goalkeeper David James plunged his club into even more trouble than they were in already, if it were possible, by leaving Portsmouth, and now he is holding talks with Celtic over a possible move to the Scottish version of the Premier League.
Whilst Portsmouth get rid of their defensive players, Arsenal want to add to theirs, and that will be through either a German or an Englishman. The London club will first make a move for Per Mertesacker for £10 million, and then if that fails, they will try once again to bring Evertons Phil Jagielka to their club. A bid of £14 million has already been rejected by Everton for the defender, but Wenger justifiably thinks he needs more defenders and Jagielka is who he wants.

Finally, for a wild rumour. A rumour which is not likely to ever be seen in reality. Manchester United want Ashley Young of Aston Villa. It's unbelievable right? Manchester United actually buying a player with proven quality? Pfft! Not this season anyway. But seriously, Ashley Young is needed by Villa, even more so if Milner leaves for, yes you know, Manchester City.

Mispronounced Names

This week Charles N'Zogbia threw his French dummy (tetine) out of his pram because, God forbid his English-born Newcastle boss Joe Kinnear mispronounced his name in an interview (well hell, if we were in the U.S.A right now Kinnear would be facing a law suit for libel).

On the chuffer coming home from work last evening, as a source of self-amusement I decided to 'seek out & destroy' the names of as many modern day players as possible in half an hour, by seeing how many I could think of that can in theory be mispronounced, mispelt, misinterpreted or misconstrued.............

So here we go:


Blackburn's Roque Santa Cruz - Roque Santa Clause

Tottenham's Pascal Chimbonda - Pastille Chew-Bon-Bon

QPR's Lee Cook - Lee Seen-Me-Silver Crook

Chelsea's on loan Jack Cork - Jack Sh*t

Southampton's on loan Nathan Dyer - Nathan Hair-Dryer

Everton's Leighton Baines - Leighton Chill-Blaines

Chelsea's Didier Drogba - Did-The-Dog-Bark (said with a stutter)

Stoke's on loan Tom Soares - Tom Cold-Sores

Arsenal's Mikael Silvestre - Mikael Sylvester-The-Cat

Belchatow's on loan Carlos Costly - Carlos Costcutter

Newcastle's Damian Duff - Damian Up-The-Duff

Reading's Jay Tabb - Pay The Tab

Chelsea's Salomon Kalou - Salomon Clueless

Doncaster's on loan Gordon Greer - Germaine Greer

Blackburns's on loan Alan Judge - Alan Judge Judy

Middlesbrough's on loan Seb Hines - Seb Heinz-Meanz-Beanz

Reading's Leroy Lita - Leroy Two-Seater


I know there must be dozens more players out there worthy of a mention, so if you want to help add to my list,then please leave your players surrogate name in the comment box below.

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